When I go to the grave, the one thing I know people will say about me (other than I was a man of great wisdom and brilliant business sense) is that I was always the best-dressed man in any room.
For the powerful businessman, the perfect suit brings everything together. Though you may have an Ivy League pedigree and winning personality, you are nothing without the proper presentation. In fact, the proper presentation is perhaps the most fundamentally important weapon in the businessman’s arsenal. It also happens to be this week’s rule.
Those who know men’s fashion respect one name above all others- William Fioravanti. One look at a Fioravanti communicates wealth, power and class. Refined, yet never flashy. Polished, yet never ostentatious, a Fioravanti says to the world, “I am a man of incredible means, impeccable taste and I am better than you.”
Now, I understand that at this point in your career you have not the means to afford an $11,000 suit. Perhaps you can afford one of their less expensive models, but I doubt it. However, I cannot stress enough the importance of looking your best. Whether that means a simple off-the-rack Brooks Brothers or a cheaper Bloomingdale’s knock-off, the businessman looking to make something of himself must model himself in the mold of his superiors. Short-sleeved dress-shirts and wrinkle-free khakis are for high-school science teachers and rural insurance salesmen.
After my grandson returned from Iraq, the first thing I did was fly my tailor to Walter Reed to take his measurements. The boy had lost a considerable amount of weight due to the many surgeries needed to treat his wounds, but the tailor was able to work with his doctors and came up with projected measurements that proved to be very accurate. Though my grandson would not accept my phone calls nor return my letters, my tailor told me he successfully impressed upon the young man the importance of looking his best. “Would you rather they notice your scars or your suit,” he asked.
"Will they notice my scars?" I can think of no finer summary of my rule than that simple question. Remember it everytime you look in the mirror.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
The Week in Review: 3/23-3/29
What I think you need to know about last week.
The Fed tries to stave off a US economic meltdown
In case you were too busy volunteering, in which case you assuredly don't care about anything that actually matters, the Fed brokered a deal that sold troubled investment bank Bear Stearns to JP Morgan Chase for $2 a share. This is big because that bastard James Cayne lost about $950 million in the deal. A year ago, his shares were worth over $1 billion. He just dumped them for $61 million.
Hillary misspeaks
I don't understand why this is news. She does it all the time.
American Airlines grounds 300 planes
The nation's largest airline grounded 300 planes for safety inspections. Every one of the airline's Boeing MD-80s were grounded on the order of a FAA directive that mandated wiring be inspected for proper installation. I can only imagine how inconvenient this was to commercial travellers. Actually, no I can't, because I'm not poor.
The Fed tries to stave off a US economic meltdown
In case you were too busy volunteering, in which case you assuredly don't care about anything that actually matters, the Fed brokered a deal that sold troubled investment bank Bear Stearns to JP Morgan Chase for $2 a share. This is big because that bastard James Cayne lost about $950 million in the deal. A year ago, his shares were worth over $1 billion. He just dumped them for $61 million.
Hillary misspeaks
I don't understand why this is news. She does it all the time.
American Airlines grounds 300 planes
The nation's largest airline grounded 300 planes for safety inspections. Every one of the airline's Boeing MD-80s were grounded on the order of a FAA directive that mandated wiring be inspected for proper installation. I can only imagine how inconvenient this was to commercial travellers. Actually, no I can't, because I'm not poor.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Things I can afford that the middle class cannot: private security services
After yesterday's posting I had to double my security detail. Apparently the Church of Scientology deploys some pretty heavy hitters if you make fun of L. Ron, though I really don't know if my security detail is prepared to deal with Xenu and his alien forces. Idiots.
When you are as powerful and rich as me you can afford to say whatever the Sam Hell you feel like. Not only is it incredibly liberating, it's a wonderful power tool. To live in a world with no repercussions is to live in Utopia. However, despite this fact, I choose to employ the best private security contractors in the world and I frequently attend training courses at Blackwater USA.
Many people are not aware that I am licensed to carry a concealed weapon. I'm wearing it right now. It's only one of the most respected handguns in the world: the Browning M1911. I have one in Gold, Platinum and Black and I carry them in one of my custom designed Italian holsters. Today I've paired the platinum with the West African Black Rhino Skin holster (I posses the only one in existence). Often, to intimidate I let my sport coat or suit jacket fall back so the butt of the pistol is exposed. It is really quite humorous.
Do I know how to use it, you ask. I can put a two round group within an inch at 10 yds. Does that answer your question? I learned how to do that at my Blackwater Advanced Pistol course. I'd recommend you attend, but you probably cannot afford to. When you have the money, you really should go. I also suggest the shotgun and highway driving courses. If nothing more, they're simply a great time.
But I digress. My private security team is what I am most proud of. Composed of former Special Forces Operators, my team is prepared to protect me from any type of attack you can imagine. I even employ a few minority operators that blend in when I travel abroad. That way the bad guys don't know the size of my protective detail. Each Operator costs just over $100,000/year to employ. That's over 600 grand a year on security. Most middle-class homes don't cost that much.
How do I afford it?
I don't. My firm employs them on my behalf. Power means not having to spend your own money. Besides, when you work in an industry that specializes in mortgage backed securities, you find that you have many enemies. Rightly, they feel that it is in every one's best interest to protect the executive management team.
Having your own private security detail is a luxury no person of wealth and power should be without. In fact, I dare call it a luxury. Necessity is probably the right term. The sad fact is that there are many who hate us. I'm sure such feelings are based purely on jealousy. And while I do not appreciate being the target of kidnapping plots and assassination attempts (which I am assured there have been many), I do like the attention such plots draw.
And Mrs. Ross likes having them around as well. Often, she requests one be posted in her room at night. She says it makes her feel safer.
When you are as powerful and rich as me you can afford to say whatever the Sam Hell you feel like. Not only is it incredibly liberating, it's a wonderful power tool. To live in a world with no repercussions is to live in Utopia. However, despite this fact, I choose to employ the best private security contractors in the world and I frequently attend training courses at Blackwater USA.
Many people are not aware that I am licensed to carry a concealed weapon. I'm wearing it right now. It's only one of the most respected handguns in the world: the Browning M1911. I have one in Gold, Platinum and Black and I carry them in one of my custom designed Italian holsters. Today I've paired the platinum with the West African Black Rhino Skin holster (I posses the only one in existence). Often, to intimidate I let my sport coat or suit jacket fall back so the butt of the pistol is exposed. It is really quite humorous.
Do I know how to use it, you ask. I can put a two round group within an inch at 10 yds. Does that answer your question? I learned how to do that at my Blackwater Advanced Pistol course. I'd recommend you attend, but you probably cannot afford to. When you have the money, you really should go. I also suggest the shotgun and highway driving courses. If nothing more, they're simply a great time.
But I digress. My private security team is what I am most proud of. Composed of former Special Forces Operators, my team is prepared to protect me from any type of attack you can imagine. I even employ a few minority operators that blend in when I travel abroad. That way the bad guys don't know the size of my protective detail. Each Operator costs just over $100,000/year to employ. That's over 600 grand a year on security. Most middle-class homes don't cost that much.
How do I afford it?
I don't. My firm employs them on my behalf. Power means not having to spend your own money. Besides, when you work in an industry that specializes in mortgage backed securities, you find that you have many enemies. Rightly, they feel that it is in every one's best interest to protect the executive management team.
Having your own private security detail is a luxury no person of wealth and power should be without. In fact, I dare call it a luxury. Necessity is probably the right term. The sad fact is that there are many who hate us. I'm sure such feelings are based purely on jealousy. And while I do not appreciate being the target of kidnapping plots and assassination attempts (which I am assured there have been many), I do like the attention such plots draw.
And Mrs. Ross likes having them around as well. Often, she requests one be posted in her room at night. She says it makes her feel safer.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Ross' Rules: Go with God
I just got back from celebrating the most wonderful Easter. Really, there is no better place to celebrate His glory and resurrection than on the pristine white sand beaches of the Caribbean. All that I have in my life I owe to Him and there is not a day that goes by that I don’t ask for His forgiveness, nor is there a Sunday that passes when I don’t worship His greatness.
See what I just did there? I created an aura of respect and trust by proclaiming my faith in the Lord. That, my friends, is another one of Ross’ Rules. To be an executive of power one must convey that he is a man of faith, because there is no easier way to earn respect than by embracing Christ.
Think about it, would you question the integrity of your evangelical pastor? Or question the ethics of the Catholic Church? Of course you don’t. To be a Christian is to be beyond reproach. You are indemnified from scandal and scorn.
Who cares if it’s all a front? Like many secrets we keep, no one will ever know.
If you want to make your trip up the Corporate Elevator as easy as possible you must remember to be an active believer and participant in the faith that dominates your geographic area. If you live in the south, you’re a Baptist. West Texas, Catholic. The Northeast, protestant. The Midwest, Lutheran or non-denominational.
I do not care if you actually believe in any of these religions. That, of course, is not the point. What is the point is that your co-workers and bosses think you do.
Just make sure they think you believe in real, Western religions, not fake ones. When in doubt, if it ends with “muslim” or comes from Asia or the mind of a science fiction writer, it’s probably not real.
See what I just did there? I created an aura of respect and trust by proclaiming my faith in the Lord. That, my friends, is another one of Ross’ Rules. To be an executive of power one must convey that he is a man of faith, because there is no easier way to earn respect than by embracing Christ.
Think about it, would you question the integrity of your evangelical pastor? Or question the ethics of the Catholic Church? Of course you don’t. To be a Christian is to be beyond reproach. You are indemnified from scandal and scorn.
Who cares if it’s all a front? Like many secrets we keep, no one will ever know.
If you want to make your trip up the Corporate Elevator as easy as possible you must remember to be an active believer and participant in the faith that dominates your geographic area. If you live in the south, you’re a Baptist. West Texas, Catholic. The Northeast, protestant. The Midwest, Lutheran or non-denominational.
I do not care if you actually believe in any of these religions. That, of course, is not the point. What is the point is that your co-workers and bosses think you do.
Just make sure they think you believe in real, Western religions, not fake ones. When in doubt, if it ends with “muslim” or comes from Asia or the mind of a science fiction writer, it’s probably not real.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
The Week in Review: 3/16-3/22
I've got to catch a limo to the airport so I'll make this quick, flying to St. Kit's for Easter. Just a little family get together in the Islands. I can think of no better place to celebrate His resurrection.
What happened this week?
Stocks went up. Stocks went down. Democrats bickered. No one cared.
Hallelujah.
What happened this week?
Stocks went up. Stocks went down. Democrats bickered. No one cared.
Hallelujah.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Things I can afford that the middle class cannot: The ROM
One of the great passions in my life is looking good. For executives, what is on the outside often matters more than what is on the inside. Though my physician tells me I possess some pretty fit innards.
As you may know I am a very busy man. Do you think I have the time to spend an hour at the gym? Of course I don’t. That’s why I purchased the ROM.
At over $14,000 this wonderful machine costs more than most pre-owned Ford Taurus’s. So, while I can get my workout in only four minutes and get on with more important things, the middle class is forced to huff and puff for hours at a time on their Sears’s treadmills and Chuck Norris wonder machines.
Or do they?
Let’s be honest people. Most middle class people possess neither the discipline nor pride to stick to a workout program. They buy their Sally Struthers’ Thigh Masters and Bowflexes and ingest magic fat pills in hopes that the pounds will melt away. But the reality is that after a week they forget their silly resolutions. They realize that looking good for a spouse who doesn’t care is a waste of energy. They wake up to the reality that being able to walk up a flight of stairs without passing out is not an issue when the building they work in has an elevator. No, these undisciplined excuses for people stuff these colossal wastes of money (surely bought on credit) under the bed or in the closet with the rest of their hopes and dreams. Their treadmill becomes a place to hang their short-sleeved work shirts and wrinkle-free khakis.
But what about those who do have the discipline to diligently work out? I’m not impressed. In fact, that they spend so much time working out illustrates their misplaced priorities. No wonder they’re mired in middle management.
To be an executive means sacrificing your health for position. At least it did before the ROM. $14,000 is a small price to pay for health and power. Just look at what it did for me.
As you may know I am a very busy man. Do you think I have the time to spend an hour at the gym? Of course I don’t. That’s why I purchased the ROM.
At over $14,000 this wonderful machine costs more than most pre-owned Ford Taurus’s. So, while I can get my workout in only four minutes and get on with more important things, the middle class is forced to huff and puff for hours at a time on their Sears’s treadmills and Chuck Norris wonder machines.Or do they?
Let’s be honest people. Most middle class people possess neither the discipline nor pride to stick to a workout program. They buy their Sally Struthers’ Thigh Masters and Bowflexes and ingest magic fat pills in hopes that the pounds will melt away. But the reality is that after a week they forget their silly resolutions. They realize that looking good for a spouse who doesn’t care is a waste of energy. They wake up to the reality that being able to walk up a flight of stairs without passing out is not an issue when the building they work in has an elevator. No, these undisciplined excuses for people stuff these colossal wastes of money (surely bought on credit) under the bed or in the closet with the rest of their hopes and dreams. Their treadmill becomes a place to hang their short-sleeved work shirts and wrinkle-free khakis.
But what about those who do have the discipline to diligently work out? I’m not impressed. In fact, that they spend so much time working out illustrates their misplaced priorities. No wonder they’re mired in middle management.
To be an executive means sacrificing your health for position. At least it did before the ROM. $14,000 is a small price to pay for health and power. Just look at what it did for me.
Monday, March 17, 2008
You can do no wrong
We all know the saying, "everybody makes mistakes." But, what you may not know is that colloquialism is rubbish. For the powerful are infallible.
As you work fervently to gain the respect of your management team you must remember that to be powerful you must model yourself after the powerful.
Does your boss ever make a mistake? You may think so, but do you ever hear him admit as much? Of course not.
Does he ever not know the answer to a question? Perhaps, but does he ever acknowledge it?
When you make a mistake you must never consider for a moment that it was your fault. There is always someone lower on the totem pole that you can blame. And if there isn't, blame the member of your team who is the least liked, least white, least male, or least attractive.
If someone asks you a question that you do not know the answer to, deflect it to the member of your team who does know. If you are working on a solo project, deflect with a generic answer about how you are still pulling the metrics together or something to that extent.
In the event that a co-worker or subordinate brings up a mistake you made, berate them for discovering the "obvious" and let them know you purposely made the mistake to see if any of "you half-wits were paying attention."
If a subordinate or co-worker asks you a question that you don't know the answer to, wave them away and tell them you don't have time to be bothered. If it is clear that you do have time, chastise them for wasting your time with such a ridiculous question. Should the question actually be of some merit, reply with, "frankly, if you don't know such things, I question your position on the team." That will throw them off guard and get them out of your hair, giving you time to come up with the answer.
Corporate America can be a viscous place, and for those who gain a reputation for mistakes and stupidity, Corporate America will be a place they will not be long for.
As you work fervently to gain the respect of your management team you must remember that to be powerful you must model yourself after the powerful.
Does your boss ever make a mistake? You may think so, but do you ever hear him admit as much? Of course not.
Does he ever not know the answer to a question? Perhaps, but does he ever acknowledge it?
When you make a mistake you must never consider for a moment that it was your fault. There is always someone lower on the totem pole that you can blame. And if there isn't, blame the member of your team who is the least liked, least white, least male, or least attractive.
If someone asks you a question that you do not know the answer to, deflect it to the member of your team who does know. If you are working on a solo project, deflect with a generic answer about how you are still pulling the metrics together or something to that extent.
In the event that a co-worker or subordinate brings up a mistake you made, berate them for discovering the "obvious" and let them know you purposely made the mistake to see if any of "you half-wits were paying attention."
If a subordinate or co-worker asks you a question that you don't know the answer to, wave them away and tell them you don't have time to be bothered. If it is clear that you do have time, chastise them for wasting your time with such a ridiculous question. Should the question actually be of some merit, reply with, "frankly, if you don't know such things, I question your position on the team." That will throw them off guard and get them out of your hair, giving you time to come up with the answer.
Corporate America can be a viscous place, and for those who gain a reputation for mistakes and stupidity, Corporate America will be a place they will not be long for.
Friday, March 14, 2008
The Week in Review: 3/9-3/15
The Week in Review: 3/9-3/15
Big week in the world of politics and escort services. All I have to say about both is that I am thoroughly enjoying watching the Socialist Worker's Party of America continue to piss down their leg. And as far as client #9 is concerned, it just illustrates the divide between those who think they have power and those who actually do. The last time I paid for sex was in Seoul and it only cost a quarter dollar.
Ferraro speaks her mind
Under most circumstances I never agree with anything emitted from the mouth of a democrat, especially one that got so thoroughly trounced back in '84. However, the former VP nominee spoke a hint of the truth when she said that Barack Obama was, "lucky to be who he is."
Of course he is, anyone who isn't Hillary is lucky to be who they are.
One in four teenage girls has a sexually-transmitted disease
I've always thought that teenagers were the disease carrying spawn of the devil, now I know they are. Mixed-gender schools are one of the most morally corrupt concepts man has ever created. That is why I guarantee that my son Preston will be attending military school. I also guarantee he won't contract HPV, the Clap, or the AIDs.
Feds lend $200 billion. Europe and Canada, up to $45 billion
For the first time, the Federal Reserve will lend Treasuries in exchange for debt and mortgage-backed securities. I can't tell you what a relief this news is. Over the last few months, my portfolio has lost more than most people make in five years. Not that this has anything to do with you; I just thought you'd like a hint at how wealthy I am.
Big week in the world of politics and escort services. All I have to say about both is that I am thoroughly enjoying watching the Socialist Worker's Party of America continue to piss down their leg. And as far as client #9 is concerned, it just illustrates the divide between those who think they have power and those who actually do. The last time I paid for sex was in Seoul and it only cost a quarter dollar.
Ferraro speaks her mind
Under most circumstances I never agree with anything emitted from the mouth of a democrat, especially one that got so thoroughly trounced back in '84. However, the former VP nominee spoke a hint of the truth when she said that Barack Obama was, "lucky to be who he is."
Of course he is, anyone who isn't Hillary is lucky to be who they are.
One in four teenage girls has a sexually-transmitted disease
I've always thought that teenagers were the disease carrying spawn of the devil, now I know they are. Mixed-gender schools are one of the most morally corrupt concepts man has ever created. That is why I guarantee that my son Preston will be attending military school. I also guarantee he won't contract HPV, the Clap, or the AIDs.
Feds lend $200 billion. Europe and Canada, up to $45 billion
For the first time, the Federal Reserve will lend Treasuries in exchange for debt and mortgage-backed securities. I can't tell you what a relief this news is. Over the last few months, my portfolio has lost more than most people make in five years. Not that this has anything to do with you; I just thought you'd like a hint at how wealthy I am.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Things I can afford that the middle class cannot.
Tonight millions of poor souls will fall asleep to the daydreams of the things they'll buy and the places they'll go if they win the $230 million Powerball jackpot.
New cars, Prevost motor homes, mansions in Maui, yachts.
Student loans, medical bills, credit card debt, upside down mortgages.
Some will even try to bargain with God, promising to give half to charity and friends and family. Of course they'll start high, but that number will dwindle as they realize all of the other things they need.
Like little children waiting for the tooth fairy, they'll fall asleep with silly little grins spread across their worn out faces.
I cannot begin to describe how great it feels to bask in the knowledge that the only thing separating my dreams from reality is nothing. Whatever I want, I get. Whatever I can imagine, I do. That is without a doubt the best thing about not being middle class.
Imagine living a life where all your dreams lay beyond reach. What a nightmare.
New cars, Prevost motor homes, mansions in Maui, yachts.
Student loans, medical bills, credit card debt, upside down mortgages.
Some will even try to bargain with God, promising to give half to charity and friends and family. Of course they'll start high, but that number will dwindle as they realize all of the other things they need.
Like little children waiting for the tooth fairy, they'll fall asleep with silly little grins spread across their worn out faces.
I cannot begin to describe how great it feels to bask in the knowledge that the only thing separating my dreams from reality is nothing. Whatever I want, I get. Whatever I can imagine, I do. That is without a doubt the best thing about not being middle class.
Imagine living a life where all your dreams lay beyond reach. What a nightmare.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Ross' Rules: It's who you know
"What do I need to do to get a job like yours?" That is perhaps the most common question asked of me. If I feel inclined to answer, my response is to tell them that they'll never have a job like mine unless they know the right people.
For example, my nephew is an idiot. The kid only got in to Yale because our family has a rich history of donating substantial sums of money to their business school. And the only reason he was able to get a job with a major New York investment bank was because I was a good friend with a board member. Now the kid is leveraging his relationships into securing a position with the State Department.
Compare his path with that of his college roommate. The young man got into Yale purely on the strength of his academic prowess and his minority status. He spent so much of his time studying to maintain the high GPA required of his scholarship that he failed to form any meaningful relationships or connections. So what is he doing? Teaching English and history back on the reservation. Sad considering what that young man was capable of. But, because he doesn't know the right people his Yale education will go to waste.
Is it fair? Not at all. However, as we all know equity has little to do with success. It's knowing the right people that will take you places.
For example, my nephew is an idiot. The kid only got in to Yale because our family has a rich history of donating substantial sums of money to their business school. And the only reason he was able to get a job with a major New York investment bank was because I was a good friend with a board member. Now the kid is leveraging his relationships into securing a position with the State Department.
Compare his path with that of his college roommate. The young man got into Yale purely on the strength of his academic prowess and his minority status. He spent so much of his time studying to maintain the high GPA required of his scholarship that he failed to form any meaningful relationships or connections. So what is he doing? Teaching English and history back on the reservation. Sad considering what that young man was capable of. But, because he doesn't know the right people his Yale education will go to waste.
Is it fair? Not at all. However, as we all know equity has little to do with success. It's knowing the right people that will take you places.
Friday, March 7, 2008
The Week in Review: 3/2-3/7
The Democratic Party: why hippies should continue to procreate
Big week last week in the world of politics. I don't know about you, but I took great pleasure in watching the Democratic Party continue to disintegrate. With Bill Clinton's wife winning Ohio, Rhode Island and Texas, it is becoming abundantly clear that they do not want to win in '08. I for one could not be happier as her nomination would guarantee a McCain victory in November.
As Michael Gerson of the Washington Post said, "a resurgent Clinton is “the Republican dream”
Rush and Coulter will vote for Clinton
Some Democrats see this is a clear indication that it is McCain who is tearing his party apart. I beg to differ. Obviously the Democrats are not familiar with the art of psy-ops. Reverse psychology is in play here people. Think about it.
High profile CEOs raked over the Congressional coals
Led by Congressman Harry Waxman, D-Cal, the House Committee on Government and Oversight Reform took three of the most respected men in business to task on their "oversized" pay packages, saying that it was questionable that "a few exec do so well when their companies are doing so poorly." Adhering to the same logic, Mr. Waxman should be asking himself the same question regarding his performance.
Military Recruiting Station Bombed
Some speculate that the bombing was the work of home-grown Islamic extremists cultivated by our own administration's actions. Clearly though, it was perpetrated by far-left pinkos. Islamic extremists, we all know, at least have the decency to blow themselves up too.
Big week last week in the world of politics. I don't know about you, but I took great pleasure in watching the Democratic Party continue to disintegrate. With Bill Clinton's wife winning Ohio, Rhode Island and Texas, it is becoming abundantly clear that they do not want to win in '08. I for one could not be happier as her nomination would guarantee a McCain victory in November.
As Michael Gerson of the Washington Post said, "a resurgent Clinton is “the Republican dream”
Rush and Coulter will vote for Clinton
Some Democrats see this is a clear indication that it is McCain who is tearing his party apart. I beg to differ. Obviously the Democrats are not familiar with the art of psy-ops. Reverse psychology is in play here people. Think about it.
High profile CEOs raked over the Congressional coals
Led by Congressman Harry Waxman, D-Cal, the House Committee on Government and Oversight Reform took three of the most respected men in business to task on their "oversized" pay packages, saying that it was questionable that "a few exec do so well when their companies are doing so poorly." Adhering to the same logic, Mr. Waxman should be asking himself the same question regarding his performance.
Military Recruiting Station Bombed
Some speculate that the bombing was the work of home-grown Islamic extremists cultivated by our own administration's actions. Clearly though, it was perpetrated by far-left pinkos. Islamic extremists, we all know, at least have the decency to blow themselves up too.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Things I can afford that the middle class cannot.
That sweet piece of aviation beauty is my Cessna Citation. I may be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure there isn't a middle class soul out there who has fractional ownership in one of these. Let's be serious, a member of the middle class has probably never see the inside of a Citation. They get to cram into a ratty commercial airline with all the other tourists and salesmen.
Do you think they like sitting next to the gentleman who needs the seatbelt extender? Do they enjoy it when spastic little kids kick the back of their seats? Of course not. But they have to deal with it because that's all they can afford. Though they dream of the day when they accumulate enough frequent flier miles to get that upgrade.
Such sad, unattainable dreams.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Ross' Rules: Never Wait
Over the weekend I visited my daughter and her family in Colorado. She and her husband had just purchased their first second home and wanted to have me out to celebrate. They were proud of their new vacation home, and though it was just a quaint little place with only six bedrooms and eight bathrooms, I told them it was a good "starter" second home, especially if they were only going to spend two weeks a year in it.
Now, I myself am a big fan of Telluride. Some folks say Aspen; others, Tahoe. But for my money the place to be is southwest Colorado. Ralph Lauren has a place down there. For some reason, Sophia and her husband love to ski at Copper Mountain, I think the place is a bit low rent, but they seem to enjoy the place, so I didn't make too many comments.
However, I will say that one of the problems with affordability is that it brings out the riff raff. The lift lines were choked with commoners and I was so relieved by the presence of the "Beeline." This welcome attempt by Copper Mountain to cater to VIPs by allowing us to bypass lift lines was obviously not nearly as nice as the efforts made at Telluride, but appreciated none the less. Of course, there are no commoners to be found at Telluride. More importantly, the Beeline reminded me of a little rule that to me is so common that I often forget to even mention it: waiting is for the weak.
Let me clue you in on a little secret: the powerful wait for nothing and no one. With my schedule I have no time to wait for the simple things regular people are accustomed to waiting for. Do you think a busy executive like myself has time to wait for a table at his favorite restaurant, much less the airport security line? Do I sound like a man who has the luxury of being able to wait while one of my underlings “gets back to me” with an answer?
I cannot, nor will not, be bothered by such trivial wastes of time.
Nor should you.
As you steadfastly climb the corporate ladder I encourage you to leave your patience at home with the rest of your useless personality flaws that have no business in the workplace. There is no better way to exude importance and power than by dismissing others when you have something to say or by berating subordinates for not having immediate answers.
The powerful do not wait for the world to cater to them. It is the world that waits.
Now, I myself am a big fan of Telluride. Some folks say Aspen; others, Tahoe. But for my money the place to be is southwest Colorado. Ralph Lauren has a place down there. For some reason, Sophia and her husband love to ski at Copper Mountain, I think the place is a bit low rent, but they seem to enjoy the place, so I didn't make too many comments.
However, I will say that one of the problems with affordability is that it brings out the riff raff. The lift lines were choked with commoners and I was so relieved by the presence of the "Beeline." This welcome attempt by Copper Mountain to cater to VIPs by allowing us to bypass lift lines was obviously not nearly as nice as the efforts made at Telluride, but appreciated none the less. Of course, there are no commoners to be found at Telluride. More importantly, the Beeline reminded me of a little rule that to me is so common that I often forget to even mention it: waiting is for the weak.
Let me clue you in on a little secret: the powerful wait for nothing and no one. With my schedule I have no time to wait for the simple things regular people are accustomed to waiting for. Do you think a busy executive like myself has time to wait for a table at his favorite restaurant, much less the airport security line? Do I sound like a man who has the luxury of being able to wait while one of my underlings “gets back to me” with an answer?
I cannot, nor will not, be bothered by such trivial wastes of time.
Nor should you.
As you steadfastly climb the corporate ladder I encourage you to leave your patience at home with the rest of your useless personality flaws that have no business in the workplace. There is no better way to exude importance and power than by dismissing others when you have something to say or by berating subordinates for not having immediate answers.
The powerful do not wait for the world to cater to them. It is the world that waits.
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